I finally got coffee and…

toilet paper. I had to bite my tongue not to say mean things today. Steve refused to walk down the road to the gas station for toilet paper. Instead, Taryn had to drive over here and bring me some. I wish to god I could do it. G doesn’t understand the bank cards or I’d of sent him – there are some things autistic teens don’t get yet. But husbands sure as hell should. So she brought me coffee creamer too. Bless her heart.
We are out of food – as far as G is concerned. He’s got dinner though. First time for crab cakes. Plain rice, imitation crab cakes. Main food of the day. I made fudge too. We have this wierd combination left over. A pack of egg noodles, cottage cheese, a box of Bisquick, 10 boxes of Jiffy Corn muffin mix, 7 potatoes, 2 onions, 6 sweet potatoes, instant milk, herb tea, peanut butter, 3 bags of beans. lol so wierd. Stuff to eat, but no real meals. No food stamps this month, we didn’t get there with the truck troubles. This next month is gonna be hard.
So on top of wiping on a kitchen towel all day, Steve did nothing on the Jimmy. He got ready to go out at 5pm and it started raining again. I kept telling him it was supposed to rain and he needed to work on it instead of being on the computer. At 7, I started making dinner and he wanted to feel me up. I told him to stop. I wasn’t giving anything up until he’s saved our house. I kept it low key, but I told him I wasn’t having him carry on about how our sex was the worst ever by having sex when I was angry. If he looses the house, I’m leaving. I really am. I love him but I’m done. I have to be someplace where G can not be worried like this. I really don’t know how to manage this, but me the kid, a cat and 2 dogs and my yarn and stuff. I guess the kids will have to help. V just found out she’s pregnant again. They wanted another baby, but it was a bit sooner than they expected. Oh the thoughts that come up. In the end…all that matters is the kindness of my kid. She wouldn’t let me write her a check for the tp and creamer and gas. And I am enjoying my coffee in the mug Stephanie sent me. It’s been a good day. 🙂

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About Morning Knits

I believe in and practice positive living. I love YARN, cooking, music, bird watching, herbs, and gardening. I am passionate about YHWH the Elohim of all the earth. I believe it's our responsibility to tend that earth. I basically do my thing in a quiet, amused way. I believe in laughter, and the power of combined prayer. I am a true homebody. I have 6 kids, all home-born and successfully breastfed. They are all grown. I'm the oldest of 9, daughter of a missionary mother who lives in Kenya, and I have a spoiled service dog and 2 rescued cats. Right now, there is balance after yrs of unemployment. My disability was approved due to degenerative discs, fibromyalgia, and obesity. That last is hard to say. I believe we owe it to ourselves to protect our mental health. It's precious and the one thing we can control. I would rather not do my own housework and I talk too much. I bought a house in North Carolina which I ended up leaving for my husband to sell. I'm a two-time caregiver. My husband and I are separated due to stroke complications and personality difficulties. I am in Texas now. The one place on earth I said I'd never go unless Yah moved me there and HERE I AM! G and I are sharing a small apartment and so far, things are going well.
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